CompassionMama

The Land of Narnia

2012-02-16T04:36:00.000-08:00

Two of my boys are in an amazing production of the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. We were privileged to get to take some pictures during dress rehearsal the other day. No. 1 Son is playing Father Christmas:

Notice - he has Minions :')

as well as an evil wolf:

The Evils ready to attack

The Artist was sooooo excited to be cast as Edmund:


Susan, Edmund, Lucy and Peter

At one point, the wolves attack Edmund - how perfect is that for the brothers?

As you can tell, the battle scenes are pretty intense. I'm proud to say the No. 1 Son had a small part in choreographing them. And The Artist actually gets to kill a panther (okay, not actually).

If you're in the area, I hope you will come see the production this weekend. You can get tickets at CYT Chicago's Website - just click here.

We have a Toddler!

2012-02-15T12:57:00.000-08:00

She can actually toddle now!

Zoe decided today was a good day to start walking for real. Check this out:

Go Zoe!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2012-02-14T07:14:00.000-08:00

Today is my birthday, so we're heading to the Museum of Science and Industry - my favorite museum in Chicagoland. I love hanging out there with my kids!

I wanted to give a quick update on Zoe's surgery yesterday. It was very quick - about 10 minutes from when they carried her away to when the doctor came out to talk to us. The clip of her tongue-tie went very smoothly, and it doesn't seem to bother her, though I will keep the ibuprofen at hand. But coming out of anesthesia was not her favorite thing - she cried for about 45 minutes. The only thing that made her calm down was daddy talking to her about her brothers and sister. That made her take a deep breath and stop crying for a minute.

The sounds she makes already sound different - clearer. Especially her "d"s. I'm so glad we did this now instead of waiting to see if it would affect her speech.

The Park plus Medical Updates

2012-02-10T10:29:00.000-08:00

The weather has been beautiful the last couple of weeks, and we made our first trip to our local park a few days ago. Zoe was excited to see the brightly colored playground, but wasn't entirely sure about exploring it. It's hard to have a toddler who can't toddle - she wants to explore but can't take off and run around.

So smart girl enlisted the help of big brother and tried out the slide.

I think she liked it :')

She also met a new friend. Some friends who traveled to adopt little B a couple of months before we did met us at the park, and they tried out the slide together.

There was a certain amount of normal toddler circling and eyeing each other, but I think they will be good friends. And doesn't B have the cutest little snowsuit!

Now whenever we pass a park Zoe points and wants to get out. I'm sure we will be there a lot this summer.

We realized two weeks ago that Zoe has an oddly shaped tongue when she sticks it out. Depending on how far, it is either square or heart shaped. So after a little internet searching we confirmed that she is tongue tied. This means that the little tissue connecting the base of her mouth to the bottom of her tongue is attached too far forward, limiting the use of her tongue. It explains why certain sounds are difficult, and why drinking from a cup is so messy. It also explains the occasional drool. A quick trip to the doctor confirmed it, and another quick visit to an ENT doctor and we have a surgery scheduled for early Monday morning (7:30 to be exact). They will clip her frenulum, releasing her tongue to move freely. They tell us it's minor surgery, and that she can eat basically normally right away. Skeptical me will have the Tylenol ready.

As for Zoe's foot, we have gotten multiple opinions, and are carefully considering and praying about our next step. We are debating a Symes amputation with a prosthetic vs. limb lengthening. The biggest factor in our decision is the future functionality of her foot, which highly in doubt. Please pray for us as we consider our options.

In the meantime, Zoe LOVES shoes. She loves to have them put on, then take them off and play with them, then have them put on again. They're even more fun on the hands!

Tired baby!

More Than We Knew Before

2012-02-01T21:07:00.000-08:00

We received a surprise in my email box today. A photo of our Zoe in her crib at the orphanage. It was in with several photos our friends sent, and it took us a little while to realize what we were seeing.

The room is bright, Zoe is well bundled and warm, drinking a bottle and looking right at the camera. There are pictures of flowers and Disney princesses above her bed. And she is strapped down with what look like strips of cloth keeping her still.

It is so hard to imagine our little princess, so full of movement and curiosity, laying flat on her back staring at pictures of flowers for even a small portion of her life. And yet. And yet there she is. This explains why one side of her head is flatter than the other - she was turned to see the beauty hanging there to her left, just out of reach.

Well now Zoe has real flowers, and beautiful clothes like those princesses on the wall. But there are other children in the pictures, and my heart is breaking for them as well as for her. So I pray for them, that their Mamas and Babas will come and get them soon, and that in the meanwhile someone will give them a kiss and a snuggle to let them know that they are not forgotten.

Good stuff

2012-01-28T06:50:00.000-08:00

A big congratulations is due to our Drama Queen. She won Best Classical Monologue at her Juries yesterday. Great stuff! And if you are confused (like I was) Juries are when all the students in the theater department - Freshmen through Seniors - present a classical and a contemporary monologue to an audience and a judge. Yesterday's judge was Jane Brody, who teaches acting at The Theatre School and has been an award winning casting director for films like Fargo and Groundhog Day. So it's pretty great that she judged Drama Queen's Lady MacBeth as the best classical piece of the show. So proud!

(No pictures of her because she's camera shy)

As for little one, I think I am going to start calling her Stinkerbell. I found the nickname on a friend's blog, and it suits her perfectly! She is into everything! We are getting a second opinion on her leg this week, so for now we're just living life.

Zoe is making major progress on the mobility front. My big brother and his wife gave her an enormous teddy bear - bigger than her. Who could have known it would be the perfect therapy tool? Zoe sat on it (as any toddler would) and realized she felt safe there. So she started standing up on her own.

She was sooooo proud!

Since then she has been standing alot - even without the bear. Two days ago Drama Queen swears she saw her take a step on her own. She'll be walking any day now.

The other day my boys wanted to make Peanut Butter Balls for some friends who have moved into the neighborhood. They had a blast, and so did little sis:

She decided to tell them how to do the job.

And once more, some random pics of cuteness for your viewing pleasure:

Shriners and Social Workers

2012-01-18T06:44:00.000-08:00

Things have been rolling along very well in our new family of 7. Zoe continues to make amazing gains in her physical and language development. She yells GeGe (brother) when she wants their attention, and she says - very quietly - Night Night and Bye Bye at bedtime. I swear she understands everything we say. She can say Nose and Eyes, and point to the appropriate feature, and she says Uh-Oh when she drops something - especially if it makes a big noise.

Zoe loves music, and will wave her hands in the air when she hears a song she likes. She also likes the piano, and mostly doesn't pound (thank goodness).

We had her first post-adoption visit with her social worker. China requires multiple reports ranging from 1 month to 5 years after adoptions. Along with the report we needed some photographs, so we quick got together a family picture:

It turned out pretty well, I think.

Yesterday was Zoe's first visit to Shriners Hospital in Chicago to have her limb length discrepancy addressed. We didn't even have x-rays, so had very little idea what was going on inside that leg and foot. It turns out that Zoe has Fibular Hemimelia, aka longitudinal fibular deficiency. Basically, Zoe has no fibula in her right leg, her right femur is slightly short, and she has a 2-ray foot. However, her tibia looks strong and straight, if short (about 7 cm short right now, with a projected difference over 6 inches by the time she stops growing).

The doctors and nurses at Shiners were very kind, and spent all the time we needed to answer questions about our options. We have two. One is limb lengthening, which would involve two 6 or 7 months sessions of stretching her leg bone, one when she is 7 or 8 years old and one when she is about 13. The problem with this is that her little foot will probably not be able to support her appropriately as she grows up. The other option is amputation of her little foot at the ankle and a prosthetic lower limb. The problem with this one is, well, it's an amputation of a cute little foot that we all rather like - especially Zoe. Either option will involve hard things, so we are taking some time to pray and consider before we make a choice.

I do know this - Zoe is an ambitious, persistent little girl who REALLY wants to walk, and to run. One of our goals will be to get her up and walking as soon as possible. After observing her for a little while yesterday, her social worker suggested the word Driven to describe her personality, and we agreed.

So - after all that heavy info, how about some great cuteness to brighten your day?

Ready for Winter


Scooting around in the great new coat Grandma and Grandpa gave her.

Playing Smash with Daddy


Love how her hair is getting longer!

Our Community

2012-01-02T15:04:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we introduced Zoe to our church, and our wonderful church community welcomed her with great enthusiasm. The Man and I shared our testimony of God's goodness at the beginning of the service.

Our wonderful pastors welcomed her.

And multiple people came up to bless her.

We are truly blessed to be part of such a wonderful church family.

Zoe really liked the music during worship - she went along with The Man as he paced back and forth like he usually does.

After a while of the walking and the music, she fell asleep.

What a cutie!

Later in the day some good friends came over and played with Zoe - she quite liked all the attention. Though when they arrived she was a bit of a mess!

We got her cleaned up and they played for a while.

My good friend Sonia has a wonderful idea for helping young people remember their identities. She has come up with some label designs for clothing, meant to be worn on jeans or other items. Sonia gave Zoe her first prototype:

Isn't is great on a pair of overalls?

Sonia would love to have more people wearing her identity labels. If you're interested, leave a comment and I'll get you in touch with her.

New Things

2011-12-30T08:13:00.000-08:00

Zoe's life lately has been full-to-the-brim of new things. New brothers, new sister, new foods (cold foods), new language, animals in the house (she LOVES the dog and cats, they don't so much like her much), gifts to open, people, friends, a car seat. Considering all the new things, she is adjusting amazingly well.

We continue to discover new things about Zoe. She loves to have her legs and feet rubbed and lotioned. She adores music, and will sing La La La whenever music comes on. She likes to drum with her daddy's drumsticks. She loves baths. She hates cribs. She very much likes to be clean. She understands just about everything we say to her, and she's starting to repeat sounds. She gets sad at night sometimes.

Zoe has passed several milestones since we've known her - her first scoot (becoming mobile) December 7. Her first pulling to stand December 20. Her first standing alone (she was so proud!) December 27. Her first cruising - from the couch to the footstool - December 29. Notice a trend here? She's definitely on the move!

Here's a couple cutie pie pictures for your enjoyment:

MMMM - Oatmeal!

And speaking of new things - The Artist was cast as Edmund in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. He's thrilled to have such a major role, and decided to get an Edmund haircut.


Here is he before the cut - looking handsome but shaggy.


And after - a perfect Edmund - and a pretty cute Artist!

No. 1 Son is also in the show - as a evil wolf and as Father Christmas. No haircut allowed for him. If you are local and can come see the show, it should be great. Click here for more info. We'd love to see you there!

A Beautiful Christmas

2011-12-26T07:44:00.000-08:00

A very Blessed Christmas to everyone! I hope your holiday was full of joy and the presence of our Saviour.

We had a wonderful Christmas Eve - some good friends came over and we sang carols and hung around together. Drama Queen accompanied us on the piano.

We've discovered that Zoe likes to sing. She La-la-la's right along with us when there is music.

Our gifts were up on a table to keep little hands from demolishing them too soon - here's a pic of our tree.

The Artist had wrapped most of the presents that were not for him. He got into making them interesting and beautiful - here are some examples of his ribbon art attachments for the gifts. I love how he thinks outside the box!

Our lingering jet lag made for an early Christmas morning - we woke Drama Queen up at 6:00 am to join the rest of us for presents.

The Man's sister and her family came in from Nebraska. Zoe had a good time getting to know her cousin - trading her bear and doll back and forth.

We ended our day with dinner in Chinatown. It was busy over there - we weren't the only people with the idea. It was a wonderful Christmas! Hope yours was wonderful too.

Winter Wonderfest

2011-12-24T16:08:00.000-08:00

One of the only things the boys asked to do for our shortened Christmas season was go to the Winter Wonderfest at Navy Pier, so the other day I took them, Zoe and a friend and headed downtown. It was busier than I had hoped, but they still had a good time.

Z-Man loves the slides.

There was a skating rink, which The Artist and Z-Man both tried out. Their friend was a much more experienced skater, so he helped Z get moving on the ice.

Zoe watched from the sidelines.

She got to enjoy throwing around foam balls - it only took one or two times of showing her for her to catch on.

She's adjusting well to life here in Chicagoland. She keeps waking up around 3:00 AM, which is a challenge for Mama, but that will end eventually. In the meantime she's definitely making herself at home.

Still on China time

2011-12-20T20:05:00.000-08:00

I feel like my body still wants to live on China time. Zoe is having the same problem. She woke up at 3:30 this morning, and we began our day. They she took a 5 hour nap this afternoon/evening. I joined her for the nap - it makes the 3:30 do-able.

Zoe had a fun bath last night - she doesn't even mind water on her face!

She was in a great mood afterward and played with Drama Queen.

Today she and Z-Man had a nice game of chase going - until I got too close and distracted her. Here's a little video I took. To see it click HERE.

Maybe tomorrow we'll be on a more normal schedule?

To good not to share.

2011-12-20T02:33:00.000-08:00

A friend who recently adopted a little Chinese sweetheart shared a blog post with me that is too good not to share. You can read it by clicking here.

Thanks to my friends and family for being fabulous through this process!

Day 22 - Travel HOME!

2011-12-18T19:58:00.000-08:00

Just a quick note to say we have safely arrived back in our home in Chicagoland. It was a very long day, but Zoe took it like the little adventurer she is.

Waiting in the airport

Entertaining herself with the wipes


Meeting Drama Queen

Zoe has decided that Drama Queen is one of us. She goes to her willingly and likes to play with her. Considering she has rejected everyone but us up to this point, she really is one smart cookie.

More later - jet lag is no fun :(

Hong Kong Day 21

2011-12-17T04:55:00.000-08:00

Today we just hung around the hotel. We are soooo ready to come home - we didn't even go sightseeing. That worked well for Zoe. She got a long nap.

She also tried out the hotel pool. Not a fan. Not a fan at all.

We sat for a while and watched the brothers. Still not a fan.

Most of the rest of the day was spent like this:

and this:

Though Zoe managed to have some fun just hanging out eating french fries. This girl is going to go into french fry withdrawal when we get home.


Love this face :')

Here we are at the restaurant at dinner. Yes that is The Man hanging her upside down. We are so classy.

No blog tomorrow - we're going HOME!

Hong Kong Day 20

2011-12-16T18:35:00.000-08:00

We are in another beautiful Marriott. I had no idea how comfortable their hotels were - very nice. We are on the island that the airport is on right off Hong Kong. Here is the view out our window - beautiful, but so much smog!

Today was a Disney sort of day. Turns out there is a Disneyland in Hong Kong - so while The Man did some meetings to pay for this trip, the kids and I went to Disney.

They have a new area called Toy Story Land. Only three rides, but they did an awesome job creating the atmosphere.

The only ride we took Zoe on was the Winnie the Pooh ride. She was not a fan.

Waaay to much stimulation.

She took a decent nap while the boys explored and rode some rides.

She had a lot more fun when we let her get down and scoot around. She really liked the light in the ground.

And the hit of the day was the Buzz Lightyear Light Up Noise Making Laser Weapon. She loved it!!!

We are so ready to come home!. Tomorrow we hang around the hotel, and repack for the plane ride. And then home!

Guangzhou Day 19 and Travel

2011-12-15T17:00:00.000-08:00

Today we went to a friend's house in Guangzhou. It was beautiful, and there was a little girl there close to Zoe's age to play with. She was still a little timid, but seemed to enjoy it. Unfortunately, we left the camera at the hotel - so not many pics today.

After packing up, we picked up Zoe's visa and headed to the train station. Little one left her home country by train, arriving in Hong Kong ready for dinner and bed.

Considering her short naps, she did brilliantly.

Here's a bit of us hanging out in the bus I think you will enjoy - click the link to watch it or copy and paste:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3EjrBuVKTQU&feature=youtu.be

Guangzhou Day 19

2011-12-14T22:14:00.000-08:00

Today we went to the American Consulate to take our oath. This makes Zoe a citizen when she reaches American soil. Unfortunately, they don't allow cameras at the Consulate. Tomorrow we got back and pick up her passport and to on to Hong Kong by train.

It was a relaxed sort of day - we spent an hour or so wandering around the park near out hotel. China has the most amazing, manicured parks - and they are always busy. Here are a few pictures from our day.

Zoe continues to become more comfortable with us, and she rejects anyone else that gets close. This is very, very good. She will now let The Man hold her and feed her, and she even went down for a nap for him today. She still prefers the Mama, though.

Love that girl!

Guangzhou Day 18

2011-12-14T02:52:00.000-08:00

Today we hung around the hotel for a while. They have an outdoor courtyard with a play area, and Z-Man and Zoe tried out the swings.

After nap time our guide took us to a beautiful park. There are many parks in the cities, and all we have seen are beautiful and well-used. This one was no different.

They had an area full of statues of kids characters - the boys had great fun with them.

They got Zoe involved also.

Some of the trees in the park were just amazing - very carefully cultivated.

We went back to Shamian Island for a little shopping and wandering around. They have some pretty cool statues there.

One tradition for adoptive families in China is to take their child's picture on the red couch at the White Swan Hotel in traditional clothes - so here she is - Ms. Zoe.

And a couple more pics for fun:

After Shamian Island we went to a large plaza downtown to see the lights in the buildings. It was a very impressive space.

The boys went running off, and Zoe seemed to want to be moving, too. So I put her down and let her walk (with help, of course). She walked farther than she has ever been willing to before - must have been inspired by the brothers.

She is a very determined little girl - she will go far.

Guangzhou Day 17

2011-12-12T20:50:00.000-08:00

Today we went to the Guangzhou XiangJiang Safari Park and Zoo. What a great place! They have so many animals, including half of all the white tigers now alive in the world. On our way in we stopped to look at the beautiful black swans. I realized that pretty much everything Zoe saw today would be new to her. She loved it!

The first part was a drive through the Safari Park, where they had all sorts of exotic animals. The boys took hundreds of pictures.

Then we went and saw the regular zoo part - again, amazing animals.

Zoe said her first real word at the zoo. It was Koala - while we were at the Koala Exhibit.

She also said Panda at the Pandas.

There was a panda character that took a liking to The Artist - freaked him out a little :')

We found an awesome platypus bench, just perfect for No. 1 Son to pose on.

There was a station where you could feed the giraffes. Even Zoe wanted to try. She is definitely an adventurous girl!


Caden and Zander feeding giraffes

On a more sober note - today The Man showed me the pictures from his trip to Xinyu, where Zoe is from. When we put up a picture of her orphanage, she had an immediate and strong reaction. She sort of stiffened and froze and looked scared. I did not expect that at all - I didn't figure she had been outside enough to recognize the building. But she certainly recognized something.

We closed the computer and went on with our day, but when bedtime came she cried and cried. I believe she is grieving her old life. Good, bad or in between, it was her life, and she had caregivers and friends she was close to. So I held her and let her cry, and sang to her and prayed for her. Please pray for her transition - as it is really hitting her now. Pray that I know how to comfort her, and when to let her grieve.

Guangzhou Day 16

2011-12-12T01:24:00.000-08:00

Today was a lazy day. We went to church at the Christ Church on Shamian Island. It was Zoe's first church service, appropriate that it was given in both Mandarin and English. She was not particularly impressed, though she did like the choir.

We went to lunch and then shopping for a bit, and then hung around the hotel. It was a nice, uneventful day. We did discover that Zoe is ticklish:

Adorable is the word of the day!

Guangzhou Day 15

2011-12-10T16:47:00.000-08:00

A bit of a geography lesson: almost all the foreign embassies in China are located in Guangzhou because for a long time Shamian Island (an island just off the city of Guangzhou) was the only place in China that foreigners were allowed to work and live. Since each adopted child must receive a visa from their new country's consulate, the vast majority of Chinese adoptions are processed through Guangzhou. Traditionally, adoptive families stay at the White Swan Hotel on the island, but it is being renovated, so the China Hotel Marriott is the current place to be. There are adoptive families everywhere - 4 from our agency, 18 from Holt, etc. They are all doing what we are doing - jumping through the hoops necessary to bring our child home, and exploring the are in the meantime.

Today was the day for Zoe's medical exam.

waiting area

This is what it looks like when lots of families try to process their kids exams at the same time:

It's nice to be around other families - but that was a bit chaotic. Our guide led us through the steps. That God for her. Zoe wasn't fond of the exam, even though it only involved a cursory look-over and some measurements. She's under 2, so didn't have to have the tuberculosis test, and we signed an agreement to have her vaccinations checked out with our own pediatrician within 30 days of getting home. We confirmed that Zoe tends to clench her teeth when she's nervous - gave the doctor a bit of a hard time looking in her mouth.

But she was soon all better - feeding Baba the goodies we brought.

Once we were done with the exams, we were free to explore the island. It is just beautiful - full of beautiful buildings and gardens.

No. 1 Son found out that Zoe loves speed - he went running with her stroller down the sidewalk, and she grinned so big!

One more good thing about the island - it has a Starbucks. Such a smart company - putting a Starbucks right in the middle of the place.

After a nap, we finished the day with a trip to the outdoor play area at the hotel, and a bath.

There were several milestones we noticed today. Zoe had been mostly silent for the last 6 days, and today she started to babble. A lot. The boys are getting her to repeat some sounds - it's fun to watch!

Also, she was able to get herself from laying on her back to sitting by propping herself sideways and pushing up. Now she's mobile from sitting and from laying down - watch out world!

Oh yeah, and she cut four teeth in the last 6 days - two top and two bottom. It's been quite a week for Zoe!

Nanchang Day 14 and Travel

2011-12-10T01:18:00.000-08:00

Today was our last day in Nanchang, and in Zoe's home province of Jiangxi. She dressed up extra special in her pink tutu for the occasion.

We headed over to Dio Coffee for our breakfast. They have Western food and good fresh juice. And coffee.

The Man has figured out that the way to Zoe's heart is to feed her and be fed by her. It's working well - she's warming up to him nicely.

In fact, she's changing and growing rapidly in many ways. She is spending much less time closed down, and as of today she is officially mobile. She scooted a couple of feet across the playroom to get a toy. There's no stopping her now!

Also - she loves shoes!

Another thing she learned to do today is drink from a straw - a very important skill in our world.

Zoe has also begun to show off her skill in pointing at things she wants, which usually brings a brother running with whatever it is she is pointing at.

It's really so much fun watching her learn and bloom. Tonight we leave Jiangxi Province and being her adventure far from home. I think she's ready for it.

Nanchang Day 13

2011-12-08T21:30:00.000-08:00

Today was a fun day for the boys. We went to a local park and walked around for a while. There was an exercise area the boys got a kick out of.

There were quite a few people in the park exercising, but exercise in China looks different that in the US. They believe exercise should be gentle, so they move and dance and yell at the lake (seriously) and draw calligraphy on the sidewalk with water. And play with spinning tops.

I think I could get behind this philosophy of exercise.

Z-Man enjoyed pushing Zoe around the park.

It was a chilly day so she was well bundled.

After walking around for a while, the boys found an amusement park. They had some great rides you don't find in the US - like Bumper Boats

The very best one looked like a spinning ride at first, but when they got on it they found that is spun slowly and rocked violently - sending them flying around. They absolutely loved it!

I can only imagine the lawsuits if this one came to the US.

We pretty much wore Zoe out - it was good to get back to the hotel for a nap.

Nanchang Day 12

2011-12-08T00:35:00.000-08:00

Today we went and visited a local historical site - Tengwang Pavilion. It showcases the history and culture of Jiangxi Province.

The buildings in China - especially the historical ones - are so full of detail and beauty. It's hard to take it all in. Here is the ceiling on the top level.

Zoe wasn't particularly impressed.

This is the view from the Pavilion across the Gan River to the New City, a whole new area built in the last 8 years. And yes, that is smog.

We hung out in the playroom after naptime waiting for our laundry to be returned. Zoe can spend hours sitting and playing with toys.

Time for a banana break.

Getting her ready for bed I discovered she can do the splits. Amazing flexibility!

That just looks so uncomfortable to me!

Nanchang Day 11

2011-12-07T02:31:00.000-08:00

Today our itinerary was all about a trip to WalMart. In China, living near a WalMart raises your property values. It is not like American WalMart - it is kind of like a cross between a JCPenneys and a Jewel.

The Nanchang WalMart we went to had four floors - the top was a movie theater, the 3rd was clothing and electronics, toys and baby stuff. There was a very nice selection of foot baths - probably 30 different kinds. Also, lots of space heaters, since homes here do not have central heating and it gets down into the 40s at night. 2nd Level was food, and the first floor was a mall. Right outside the door to the WalMart was a kids playroom with the oddest play area - apparently the whole point of this rotating thing was to bonk the babies as they swung (slowly) around.

We did not go in.

Zoe and I took a little break while The Man went to find a shaver to replace the one he fried in the bathroom outlet. No luck, but it was a nice break.

I think the oddest product we saw there was chocolate flavored microwave popcorn.

While Zoe napped, Z-Man rearranged the playroom.

After a good long nap, we went to a nearby restaurant that caters to locals and Westerners. We got some really, really good french fries.

And some frou-frou juice drinks.

Zoe wasn't so sure about the drink umbrella being on her head. I don't blame her.

And to finish off the post today - here are two more pics of the pretty girl, just 'cause.

Nanchang Day 10 Pictures

2011-12-05T23:57:00.000-08:00

Here are a few pictures from our day together. Zoe spent a lot of time playing with the boys. The hotel has a great playroom on our floor for adoptive families, so we spent a lot of time there.

After a bit of a nap, she also spent some time in our room hanging out.

Doesn't she look tough in No. 1 Son's hat?

She likes to look at the photo book with our pictures inside that we sent her at the orphanage.

She tried her first french fry, but wasn't impressed. Actually, neither was I - they were kind of cold and soggy.

She was also not impressed by her bath, though she tolerated it okay.

What a cutie!

Nanchang Day 10

2011-12-05T04:34:00.000-08:00

Our first full day with Zoe. She slept all night in her little crib in our room, and didn't cry at all - much to our surprise. She ate a big breakfast at the hotel and then we hung around for a few hours. Our guide Jenny took The Man and Zoe and I to several government offices to turn in money and forms, and when we were all done Zoe was officially ours. Hooray!

I will post pictures later. For now, a few observations about Zoe:

She is very passive. I don't think this is her true personality - I think it is a reaction to the trauma of leaving everything she has known to come to this strange place and these strange people. Still, very passive. If you lay her down, she lays there. If you sit her up, she sits there. She begins to open up when Z-Man plays with her - she loves stacking rings and stacking cups. But when we went out in the van to the offices, she shut down again.

She had no reaction beyond a mild frown to seeing the head of her orphanage again today. That tells me that she really didn't know the lady, and that the car ride yesterday was not her favorite memory.

She will feed herself if we set food right in front of her, but seems to be used to being fed bite by bite. She can't seem to drink from a sippy cup or a regular cup, but they said she only takes a bottle at night. It is a struggle to get enough liquids into her.

She likes her Mama - she looks to me for comfort and reassurance, and lets me calm her down when she is upset. This is an amazing blessing.

She doesn't seem to be feeling her best - her chest gurgles a little when she breathes sometimes (not a wheeze) and she occasionally coughs or sneezes. I'm watching her temp (currently normal) and her breathing, and I have antibiotics ready if needed.

She loves Z-Man. She has even talked to him a bit - gesturing to toys and babbling. And Z is great with her. He brings her toys and stacks them with her over and over. The other boys are good with her, too, but Z is really awesome. She is most "herself" when she is playing with him.

So far she will eat just about anything we bring to her mouth, but she does know how to shake her head "no" if she doesn't want any more.

I see now why some of her medical reports say she has two toes and some say three - her little foot has a normal big toe and then two little toes kind of stuck together. We're calling it 2 and a half toes. A side note - No. 1 Son really wanted a sibling with interesting digits, so he is very happy with her little foot.

I realized this evening that I don't know if she can crawl or stand, or even roll over. She sits great, and she lays down, and she hasn't done anything else. It's kind of nice to have a non-mobile little one who stays where you put them, but I'm sure this won't last long. I haven't wanted to push her during this bonding phase, but soon I will try to figure out what she can do.

She is a chunk - great chubby thighs and little rolls at the neck. No worries that she didn't get enough food. So very glad about that.

I am enchanted with her. She is beautiful and sweet and I am sure there is a spunky little girl inside this passive little princess. I've seen glimpses, and I can't wait to get to know the real Zoe.

Zoe has arrived!

2011-12-04T02:21:00.000-08:00

She's here!

She's here and she's beautiful!

She arrived with the Orphanage Director and a driver in a beautiful celebratory jacket and pants. As well as a shirt, two sweaters and more pants. She sure was bundled up!

We are thrilled. She is apprehensive - checking us out and watching everything closely.

She did feel comfortable enough to take a nap on my lap - it was so good to snuggle with her!

No. 1 Son drank a Chinese Red Bull earlier, so while Zoe and I were vegging he was climbing the walls. Maybe no more Red Bull?

To celebrate we got Western food - Pizza from Papa John's! Can you tell The Artist is happy?

Zoe got her first bite of Pizza - she seemed to like it. She ate quite a bit.

Zoe has been playing with her stacking toys - she knows how to use them. I was hoping she had played with some like them at the orphanage, and I think I was right.

Notice the bottom of her foot is red? She had to have her footprint stamped on the adoption documents. We only needed our thumbprints.

So very glad to have her!

Lijiang Day 7 and Nanchang Day 8

2011-12-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we left beautiful Lijiang and began the adoption portion of our trip. Z-Man had a good time tearing apart our hotel room before we left.

We took a last walk around Old Town and The Artist made a puppy friend.

We spent most of the day traveling - sitting in airport and airplanes. But even traveling you can find interesting things - like this fruit The Artist photographed at a vending stall at Kunming Airport. Any idea what it is? Yeah - me neither.

Today we are at the hotel in Nanchang. Zoe will be arriving around 3:00 this afternoon, and the whole family will be different. I can't wait to meet her, but the whole thing is also terrifying. So glad God is in control!

Nanchang is a city of 5 million people a couple of hours away from Zoe's city, Xinyu. Here's the view out our hotel window.

It is a modern city, China style. Here's a close up of the building across the street from our very nice hotel. Notice the chickens living on the roof.

I will be updating the blog later this evening once we have Zoe, so check back in the morning Chicago time :')

Lijiang Day 6

2011-12-02T20:01:00.000-08:00

Today we headed out of Lijiang into the countryside. We passed several little villages and went up over some impressive hills to the first bend of the Yangtse River - a point on the globe you can see from space. The view was beautiful, and the boys had a good time throwing stones and using their slingshots into the river.

They had the most fascinating vehicles in this town - Dad, this picture is for you :')

We hung around the little town for a while and had lunch - the guys got to choose their ingredients.

Tomorrow we head out to Nanchang, and the day after we meet Zoe!

I'll leave you with one last picture of our amazing hotel.

Lijiang Day 5

2011-12-01T16:52:00.000-08:00

Lijiang is the most beautiful place I have ever been. It doesn't hurt that our hotel is absolutely gorgeous. The rooms all open outside to a corridor with a little river/fountain with fish.

The water comes flowing out of the mouth of a dragon right outside our room.

We went into a section of the city that is ancient, full of shops and Naxi people (the local native population).

We met up with Uncle B, who lived here for four years, and he showed us around. He speaks Mandarin, so it is really nice to have him around :')

We met a man with a trained bird - some sort of falcon? It was HUGE, and he let the boys hold it.

The Artist needed some help - it was so heavy.

The ancient city of Lijiang has a river running through it - right under the streets in some places.

This bridge dates back to before the year 1200.

We went to a famous park and walked around for a while - it was just gorgeous.

You can seen Jade Dragon Snow Mountain in the back - partially covered by clouds. It is 18,000 feet high.

Tomorrow we will head out of town and see some countryside.

Travel Day 4

2011-11-30T18:27:00.000-08:00

I have no pictures of today, because all we did was travel. Most of it was sitting around in various airports and vehicles, but there was some excitement in the Kunming Airport. We were supposed to have a 3 1/2 hour layover there, but the flight from Beijing was delayed. We ended up making it through the airport, from claiming our baggage (they wouldn't check it through) to checking our baggage, through security to the airplane - including a mad dash across the airport - in just about 40 minutes. God was with us!

Lijiang is gorgeous, and our hotel the most beautiful I have been in. I will post pictures later for sure.

Beijing Day 3, Hutong and Tiananmen Square

2011-11-29T15:40:00.000-08:00

Today we visited a traditional Chinese neighborhood, called a Hutong, including a rickshaw ride. We also we up into the Drum Tower that broadcast the time for hundreds of years from the center of the city.

After the Hutong Tour we had a little taste of home at MickyD's. It was so good! Of course The Man went down the street and got himself some Baotse instead.

Later we went to Tiananmen Square. We explained a bit of Chinese history to the boys, and they played with their new toy - something like a combination of a Badminton Birdie and a Hackeysack.

Tomorrow we head to Lijiang.

Beijing Day 2 - Forbidden City and Great Wall

2011-11-28T17:38:00.000-08:00

Today we got to see two of the most famous sights in Beijing - the Forbidden City and the Great Wall. The Forbidden City was the home of the Emperors of China from the 1400s through the last Emperor - Pu Yi, in the early 20th Century. It is a huge complex that was forbidden to anyone not in or serving the royal family. We navigated the aggressive street vendors and even bought a couple things, and found a guide to take us inside.

No. 1 Son found some Red Bull, so he was happy.

Next our guide took us to a jade factory, where we learned how jade is carved.

Then we went to the Great Wall. Wow was it steep!

The steps were very worn and quite uneven. Climbing it was a challenge.

We all made it up to the first guard tower.

The guys went on higher. Zander would have kept going, but it was time to get back to the van.

It was quite a day!

Beijing Day 1 - Travel and more Travel

2011-11-27T15:41:00.000-08:00

We are in China! 13 hours is sure a long time to fly, but the seats were pretty comfortable and we made it without too much drama. We even got a couple of hours of sleep here and there. I must say, the smog in Beijing is intimidating - you have to see it to believe it.

After a 45 minute cab ride we arrived at our hotel near Tiananmen Square. The boys were pretty much fried, but we still needed to get some food. We ventured out and found a line of street vendors with interesting food like grubs on a stick and other questionable offerings.

No. 1 Son found some chicken he liked, and The Artist and Z-Man found something like pot stickers.

The Man found food easily :')

On the way back we stopped and watched 200-300 people line dancing in the square outside the Catholic Church. It was a bit surreal.

We managed to stay up until about 9:00 (7:00 am in Chicago) and slept until 4:30 - not bad. Lots of good tea should help us through the day - even Z-Man enjoys it with lots of cream and sugar.

We're off to see the Great Wall today - more pics later.

We're off!

2011-11-26T06:01:00.000-08:00

Well, here we go. We leave for the airport in an hour. We will board a 13 hour flight direct to Beijing. When we arrive it will be about 1:00 am our time, but 3:00 pm their time. This should be interesting.

We will be updating the blog as regularly as we can - hopefully almost daily.

See you on the other side of the world :')

Happy Birthday, Dad!

2011-11-25T17:22:00.000-08:00

My father turns 80 years old this week. He's lived quite a life so far - especially for a man who grew up on a farm in Southeastern Nebraska. I had the privilege of traveling with him through London to Mozambique and Kenya a few years ago. He was an awesome traveling companion - always with interesting observations and comments about people and how they think.

Dad is an awesome grandpa. He taught Drama Queen and No. 1 Son to drive a car in a field on the farm he grew up on. He fixes tractors and has a shed Z-Man loves to explore.

He and Mom we able to go with us to the Grand Canyon years ago when Z was a baby. It was cold!

Mom and Dad have three kids - my brother and sister and I, and soon-to-be 11 Grandkids. They also have 17 Great Grandkids. Dad pointed out today that it's not many men who get to have another Grandchild so near their 80th birthday.

Happy Birthday, Dad. Any many more!!!

We love you!

Schedule

2011-11-22T18:51:00.000-08:00

Well, we've got our schedule ironed out, so I thought I would (finally) share with you all.

We leave this Saturday the 26th and fly to Beijing.
The 27th through the 29th we explore Beijing - Great Wall, Forbidden City, etc. It will be cold there, so hopefully the weather will cooperate.
The 30th we fly to Lijiang to explore the city my brother-in-law lived for several years. It is supposed to be absolutely beautiful.
We stay in Lijiang until December 3rd, when we fly to Nanchang.
The 4th is the day we MEET ZOE!
We stay in Nanchang for a few days getting to know her and taking care of various paperwork.
The 9th we fly to Guangzhou, the city where all adoptions are finalized. We stay there until we have Zoe's passport on the 15th.
That day we take a train to Hong Kong, where we will stay for a couple days while The Man does some business and then...
HOME on the 18th!

3 weeks in China - Pray for us!

Travel Approval!!!

2011-11-09T12:18:00.000-08:00

We got our Travel Approval from China today - a week before I started looking for it!

More details to follow, but it looks like we will travel the day after Thanksgiving!

Hooray - Zoe here we come!

One More Step

2011-10-31T20:49:00.000-07:00

Good news today - our Article 5 was submitted to the CCCWA. That means we are one step closer to Travel Approval! TA could come anytime in the next 3 to 8 weeks, but we are hoping for 3! If that happens we will definitely have Zoe home for Christmas!

In the meantime we are having a beautiful day, celebrating Halloween with friends and lots and lots of candy.

The Artist decided he would sit out the Trick or Treating this year and give out candy.

He and Gracie at least dressed up a little:

Z-Man was a Ninja for the fourth year in a row.

And No. 1 Son went as a character he calls Oldy Moldy.

Good friends joined us for the evening.

With Drama Queen at a friend's house, we were definitely short on girls! Our friends daughter needs another girl around, don't you think?

No. 1 Son has big boys over to Trick or Treat with.

Good friends make fun holidays awesome!

Pumpkin Carving

2011-10-27T18:17:00.000-07:00

Every year the kids carve pumpkins with The Man. This year Drama Queen was away turning a friend's hair pink, but the tradition carried on with the boys.

As usual, they were disgusted by the pumpkin guts.

Z-Man drew his outline on his pumkin watched his daddy cut it out.

No. 1 Son took on the carving himself this year.

The Artist's total rejection of anything evil or scary turned his pumpkin into an advertisement for his very favorite activity - Christian Youth Theater.

I love a good tradition.

Pumpkins

2011-10-25T20:41:00.000-07:00

The boys and I took the day off from schooling and took a field trip to Bengtson's Pumpkin Farm, our yearly tradition. It was a beautiful fall day, perfect for enjoying the Fall.

The petting zoo was fun - Number 1 Son especially liked the "cuddly cows."

We went on a hay ride:

and spent quite a bit of time at their newest attraction - a corn pit.

Z figured out how to look headless - it was a little freaky.

We finished the day off with our traditional trip to the Pig Races - cheering for the PotBellied Pigs

It was a beautiful day with my boys.

So Blessed!

2011-10-23T19:37:00.000-07:00

Today three of my dear friends threw a shower for Zoe. What a blessing! I felt so loved by all the people who made it and the sweet wishes of those who couldn't come. Drama Queen spent much of the time taking pictures, which was awesome! Here are a few of my favorites:

Thanks, dear daughter for the pictures. And thanks, dear friends, for the lovely blessings for Zoe.

New Camera

2011-10-17T21:02:00.000-07:00

My sweet husband got me a new camera yesterday to document our trip to China and our new daughter. I've been playing around with it and my new Picassa software. It definitely takes photos my little point-and-shoot digital couldn't take:

I was also playing with effects, but I'm proud to say the marigold/bee picture is untouched :')

Help these families bring their children home!

2011-10-14T09:08:00.000-07:00

My heart for adoption is much bigger than our own journey. There are so many families who have the love and the space for another child, but need financial help bringing them home. My friend Adeye has opened up her blog to highlight some of the families who are in urgent need of funds to bring their children home, and she is offering prize incentives to get people to donate!

Please take a look at her blog, scroll past the prizes and look at the faces of the kids waiting for their families. And consider donating to one (or more) who pull at your heartstrings.

Click Here for the blog.

And if you do donate - don't forget to leave a comment on Adeye's blog to be entered into the prize drawing!

As for me, my heart is especially touched by the families bringing home older boys. They are so hard to place, and they deserve a mama and daddy just like our daughter does. Maybe someday...

Update!!!!

2011-09-26T20:37:00.000-07:00

The wonderful Anne at Red Thread China (www.RedThreadChina.com) got updates for us of Zoe! Isn't she just gorgeous!

Don't you just want to put a smile on that little face?

As for the institutional hair cut - say goodbye to that look. This is the shortest her hair will ever as long as I have anything to say about it.

We also got updated measurements that show she's not grown in the past four months, still 30 inches high and 22 pounds. She looks healthy and warm - and sad. I just can't wait to bring her home!

Care Package

2011-09-23T10:14:00.000-07:00

Today we are sending a care package to Zoe at her Social Welfare Institute. We used RedThreadChina.com so that the Institute would not have to pay import fees to receive the package. Anne at RedThread sent these pictures of what is inside the package - two outfits, a soft blanket, a toy, some hair clips, a photo album, a camera and a letter with some candy for her caretakers.

She will get this soft photo album with these pictures inside. I don't know what the labels say...

The camera has her name on it. Hopefully we will receive it back when we meet Zoe with pictures of her life inside.

Anne did a beautiful job choosing items. She is also asking for an update on Zoe, so it is possible we might get new measurements and even pictures! That would be such a blessing!

25 Years

2011-09-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

The Man has been out of town for several days now ministering to a very good friend who is fighting for his life. He has been deeply immersed in this foreign, overwhelming, amazing experience while keeping the business running

So imagine my surprise to find this on my table when I got home yesterday:

The attached card read "Happy 25th Anniversary of our First Date (one day late)."

Wow. We have been a couple for 25 years. And he remembered it!

So, a message for The Man, two days late:

Thank you, my dear husband, for being my faithful, loving other half for a quarter of a century. Thank you for being my memory, of reminding me of special things that have happened when I get caught up in the daily. I love you.

One step closer

2011-09-09T09:21:00.000-07:00

We are one small step closer to traveling to China. Yesterday we were notified that US Immigration has approved Zoe to become a US citizen. Now the paperwork goes to the Visa center for travel approval from them. We are still looking to travel between Thanksgiving and Christmas this year.

I added an adoption timeline to the right side of the blog. We had the worst homestudy experience I have ever hear of - it took more than a year to get it done. It usually takes just a few months. My advice to potential adoptive parents: Choose your homestudy agency carefully!

I recently uploaded a bunch of photos from this summer off of a camera I had misplaced. There were a bunch of pictures from our trip to Nebraska to visit family on the 4th of July. We spent some time at my sister's house with cousins. There were even kittens!

Z hanging with cousin S.

Loving the kittens!

Cousins E and E from Arizona want to try out the awesome 4-wheeler.

But No. 1 Son actually got to drive it.

This is the house I grew up in - a sturdy old 4-square on acres of land. I'm so glad my sister has it now and is taking such beautiful care of it.

My Mom and Dad watching the kids set off fireworks.

The wonderful Lincoln Children's Museum:

I'm sure you can see why Z loves this place!

Introducing...

2011-08-18T13:10:00.000-07:00

The newest Marshall! We will use the name Zoe here on the blog.

She was born April 28, 2010 and is currently living Xinyu, Jiangxi Province. Isn't she adorable!

The first pictures were taken in December, this next one was taken in May.

Her report says: Zoe was born with a deformity of her right foot and leg. She laughs aloud when being teased. Her nannies are working with her on standing and walking. She babbles and imitates sounds. When she sees a caregiver or familiar person, she will stretch out her hands to ask to be cuddled.

We should be traveling sometime between Thanksgiving and Christmas of this year.

Rejoice with us! God is indeed good!

You can make a difference (and maybe win an iPad!)

2011-08-18T08:21:00.000-07:00

My friend Adeye is an amazing woman; a mother and an advocate for children, especially those with special needs. It has been an honor to get to know her through her blog.

She has become aware of a little girl who desperately needs a home. Liliana (not her real name) is 11 years old. She has downs syndrome and weighs as much as a new baby due to a lifetime of neglect.

You may be thinking - sure, but what can I do about it? I'm not called to adopt Liliana. Well, there is something you can do about it!

Adeye has put together the most amazing raffle I have ever seen - 2 iPads, $500 gift certificates, and all sorts of other great swag. All the donations from this will go to assist in Liliana's adoption. What an amazingly easy way to do something good for a little one!

Check out Adeye's blog here. Please consider donating. And let me know if you win something - I'd love to have some of the winners come through my blog!

Renaissance Faire

2011-08-16T19:32:00.000-07:00

No. 1 Son's 13th birthday is coming up, and more than anything he loves to go to the Bristol Renaissance Faire. So Sunday we grabbed three friends and his brothers and spent the day there.

They love to bungee bounce on a trampoline. The Artist can do multiple flips in mid-air - it's pretty amazing to watch.

This picture shows Z-Man and No. 1 Son both bouncing at the same time.

Z-Man likes to go high, but doesn't try flipping yet.

No. 1 Son has been saving for months and months to buy something awesome at the Faire this year. He chose Bear Claw gauntlets, which I must say are quite intimidating. He seems pleased.

One of the favorite parts of the Faire is when the regular commoners take on the "Barbarians" and try to capture their sacred helmet. You can see No. 1 Son right in the front middle with a brown cape on, ready to attack.

He also loves the sparring ring.

The Artist got some pretty awesome fire face paint done.

Z-Man's biggest score was a working miniature catapult that shoots marshmallows. We now have miniature marshmallows all over the house.

The snow cone was a nice break.

No. 1 Son makes a sandwich out of any meal. We took the friends and brothers out to Golden Corral - a perfect place for teenage boys. He made a sandwich with his steak and mashed potatoes on their yummy yeast rolls.

All in all it was a very appropriate 13th birthday celebration.

I miss her

2011-08-15T09:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at church I was sitting in the back, as I often do. It is open back there, and moms of crawlers and toddlers often sit there and to give their kids some space. And I realized that I would probably be sitting there all the time once our little one is home, at least for a few months until I am ready to let her go into the nursery.

I miss her. It feels the same as when my older kids are away at camp. Like a part of me is somewhere else. She needs to come home. Now. But of course the masters of the papers will keep that from happening for at least 2 or 3 more months, maybe more.

And so I think of her as she learns to walk. As she sits in the little cart/high chairs the kids spend a lot of time in. As she sleeps while we are awake and plays while we sleep. As she lives in an institution instead of a family, even though she is already a beloved daughter. And I miss her.

Much better

2011-08-13T18:28:00.000-07:00

We finished the last bits of the painting today. I love the colors - so much better than beige!

Z did a great job with our little alcove.

We still have some cleaning up to do and some pictures to hang, but here's a taste of what it will look like:

My three goofballs have such a hard time all smiling together, so I thought I'd just give you all our attempts and let you enjoy the silliness.

Paint Redo

2011-08-09T15:04:00.001-07:00

After waking up in the middle of the night and still hating the beige, I offered my remaining two gallons to a friend and The Artist and I made a trip to Home Depot for new paint. He really has an eye for color! We settled on an olive for the dining room, a rust for the living room and a color I can't describe for the entry room. The company calls it Cork, but that just doesn't do it for me.

So much better!!!!

Gracie isn't sure what to think of all the upheaval.

The painting is going really fast, mostly because Drama Queen really wants money for the Renaissance Faire this weekend. She's working hard!

Paint

2011-08-08T18:22:00.000-07:00

For the last 5 years we have been blessed to have a beautiful faux-finish paint on the walls of the three big joined rooms on our main floor. It looked like parchment, and we all loved it. But I found out the hard way that you can't patch faux-finish and have it look decent, and after five years there was some serious patching needed.

So we have taken on the project of repainting three large rooms with many odd angles and surfaces.

Drama Queen has decided that this is her project, and spent hours today painting and sanding the spackle that I put on.

Z-Man very much wants to help, so we let him handle the paint brush for a while.

Painting sure takes over the whole house. It's a mess getting everything away from the walls. And I'm afraid that I'm going to hate the biegeness of the rooms, but I'm afraid of making the house dark if I put up the colors I would really like.

I told Drama Queen we can always go back and add color after the beige is done. Maybe just putting the paintings back on the walls will help?

Back from Camp

2011-08-06T19:32:00.000-07:00

Today I picked up my two youngest boys from Camp Timber-lee in Wisconsin. Our family has been going to this camp for 7 years now, so we know it well. They both had a great time. This was Z-Man's first camp experience, and he's ready to go back for more next summer. I think he would go for a whole week if they would let him, but he will still have to do their starter-camp for two nights until he's in 4th grade.

Here are some pictures of the boys at the nature center at the camp. They LOVED the snakes. Z is convinced he would be willing to feed the snakes if only I would allow one at home, but I know better. And then who would get stuck feeding the snakes their mice? Not gonna happen.

The Artist and his friend attended horse camp, so of course we had to go check in with the horses before we left. He sure does love animals!

Are we causing Child Trafficking?

2011-08-05T07:47:00.000-07:00

One of the blogs I follow took on a really tough subject today. Lori Printy is an adoptive mom of 6 kids, 3 of whom are adopted internationally. In her blog here she asks the hard question: What role do international adoptive parents play in child trafficking?

This is such an hard, awkward, uncomfortable subject. I appreciate that she is taking it head on, and that she forced me to examine and articulate my answer. The following is what I wrote:

What a good question, Lori. It's one most people, including me, are afraid to look at too closely.

I am an adoptive parent waiting on the last couple of months of paperwork for a special needs adoption from China. As much as I know my motives, and those of the vast majority of adoptive parents, are good, loving, moral ones, I know that the money I am "donating" in China is a powerful incentive for child trafficking. I also know that every child deserves a family, not an institution, to grow up in.

In my case, my daughter was probably abandoned because of her birth defect. This gives me some comfort because I can be fairly certain she wasn't stolen. But the whole system that makes a mother abandon her child for the sake of medical care is most certainly very broken. Now that she has been abandoned, the choices for her no longer include her birth family, at least until she is older and we can seek to find them.

I sit uneasily with the fact that someone's tragedy will become my blessing. Only huge changes in government would fix the problem that made my daughter available to me. But generally I would love to see the profit margin removed from the adoption equation. That would remove the incentive for the trafficking of children.

Lori, I saw that you are going to the Empty Stroller March. My husband and I will be there - I hope to meet you.

Hopefully many more people will comment, and this will spark a good discussion on a very hard subject. Check out her blog and see what people are saying.

Block Party, Adler and Piggies

2011-08-03T11:33:00.000-07:00

Sorry it's been a while since I've posted. We've been going about our business, waiting for our LSC paperwork (42 days and counting) and enjoying the summer. Shopping for a little girl has been great fun. I have discovered some great little girl clothes at garage sales, and Drama Queen and I were sad to see that IKEA no longer sells cribs.

Our block does a great party every year, and this year we were actually in town to enjoy it. The local fire department came out and soaked the kids, and let my little one crawl around in the fire truck and ask questions to his heart's content. We had friends over, and even Drama Queen got into the spirit and painted some faces.

The neighbors put up a sheet and showed Despicable Me, complete with lemonade and popcorn. Even Gracie enjoyed it.

Yesterday I took advantage of the slow days with The Artist away at camp and took Z-Man to his much-loved Planetarium for some one-on-one time. He sure loves space!

And finally, I want to introduce our newest family members! Meet Luca and Lisa, our guinea pigs:

One thing I didn't realize when I committed to taking these pigs is how big a cage they would need. But they are sweethearts, and we've found a good place to put it.

And that's what's going on here. Life is always an adventure...

First World Problems

2011-07-03T06:38:00.000-07:00

Here's a little perspective for your day. I got a kick out of it:

Thanks to Christine at www.welcometomybrain.net for bringing this one to my attention.

Pre-Approval!

2011-06-21T18:03:00.001-07:00

We got Pre-Approval today for our adoption of our little one! Hooray! We are all excited and a little scared :') It still feels unreal that after all this time we know who she is!

We should be able to travel to get her somewhere between November and February.

I've been looking at her pictures, trying to figure out what she actually looks like live and in person. I suspect she has the kind of beautiful eyes that almost disappear when she smiles, but it's hard to tell because she is so serious in all her photos. We will be able to post her pictures and her name once we get our next document from China, hopefully in 5 to 8 weeks.

We still don't know her actual measurements. Hopefully we will get at least one update before we travel so we know what size clothes to buy for her.

We are very blessed.

New Things

2011-06-09T19:41:00.001-07:00

It's been a big day at our house. 11 years ago today The Artist was born. We are so blessed to have him as a son! He got several items for his birthday that he was very excited about.

Like a DSiXL

And a pogo stick (gotta love the hair!)

Unfortunately, he started feeling bad, and by noon was definitely sick. He spent the rest of the day like this:

I told he we would officially postpone his birthday until next week. Please pray with me that this passes quickly and he gets back to his normal, silly, bubbly, awesome self soon.

Z has a big day today also - he lost his second top front tooth. He looks a bit like a vampire when he smiles a certain way:

But really he's just so cute this way!

And in other, very important, news, we send in our Letter of Intent today for the little one who will hopefully be our #5. Our agency will look everything over and submit it to China, and hopefully we will hear in a week or so that we have PreApproval (PA) for her. Then we will have to wait about two months for official approval, and at that point we can post pictures. Until then, just take our word for it -she's just beautiful!

A Little One

2011-06-04T14:03:00.000-07:00

Our agency called yesterday to tell us there was a little girl they though we might be interested in. She has a shorter right leg and a deformed foot, and she is only 13 months old. Did we want to see the file? Of course!

So after looking the file over and consulting with a doctor, we are praying for God's wisdom as to whether this little one is our daughter. Honestly, I had mentally prepared myself for an older child - 3 or 4 years old - not a baby. I didn't think it would be possible to get a little one so young. The doctor says she looks mentally normal and physically fine other than the right leg.

But 13 months old! She would be 19 months or older by the time we were approved to travel to get her. Will you join us in praying for wisdom? Here is a little glimpse of her saying hello:

Prom!

2011-05-21T08:34:00.000-07:00

My gorgeous Drama Queen went to her first prom yesterday. Her school is small enough that everyone goes to prom. Since her trumpet-playing boyfriend was out of town performing, she went with her good friend, the one that introduced her to her amazing school.

They got matching orchid corsages that gave them each a pop of color.

Aren't they just beautiful!

Santa Fe

2011-05-05T07:38:00.000-07:00

Perry and I spent a few days in Santa Fe at a Strategic Coach Couples Retreat. We got a lot of business and personal insights, and made a lot of progress on our business planning. We also spent quite a bit of time relaxing in the beautiful Santa Fe downtown and exploring all the art galleries along Canyon Road.

One day we even made it out of town to the Kasha-Katuwe Tent Rocks National Monument. It was gorgeous is a desolate sort of way - which Perry absolutely loves. Here are some of our best pics from the trip:

One part of the hike takes you into a slot canyon - the sort of landscape you would never know was there until you were in it. Pictures don't do it justice.

Z-Man is 7!

2011-05-03T07:20:00.001-07:00

Our awesome Z-Man turned 7 last week. There were presents, hot dogs and a trip to the Museum of Science and Industry, where we toured the U-505 submarine and played in the Idea Factory.

Z is such a blessing to us. I can't believe he's 7 already!

Thanks for the card and the money, Grandma and Grandpa - he loved it!

Spring Break

2011-04-13T12:48:00.001-07:00

Last week the kids and I got away for a much needed break. We went to Ocala, Florida to spend time with some friends, and had four days of great fun.

We spent multiple hours over several days at a wonderful place called Charlie Horse Ranch in Ocala, Florida. The kids got to learn Polocross and go on a trail ride, and they loved the horses! The people there were awesome! If you are in the area check them out at http://www.cactusjackstrailrides.com

Z absolutely loved everything about the horses.

We spent two days in Orlando at Disney and Sea World/Aquatica. I hung with the younger guys, and Drama Queen and No. 1 Son took off together park-hopping.

Proof Drama Queen and No. 1 Son can get along!

We had the best balloon animal maker ever make stuff for us at Landry's in Orlando. Drama Queen got a flamingo:

Our friends got a shark hat:

And The Artist asked for a orange and purple caterpillar on a leaf made into a hat. And he made it!

No. 1 Son asked for a scorpion:

We also spent some time at a Manatee habitat and rescue center.

All in all, it was an awesome trip!

Today

2011-03-16T15:27:00.000-07:00

This made me cry today:

Actually, I think I would have cried over that one any day. My heart is still strongly called to adoption, in spite of the disappointments. I also realized that I need to take some time to grieve for the daughter we will not have before I go looking for the daughter we will.

Bad News

2011-03-15T13:04:00.001-07:00

I got a call from our adoption agency today. They told me that another family has submitted a Letter of Intent for the beautiful little girl who we thought was our daughter. Because her file had been transferred to another agency while we were reviewing it, the other family gets first right to claim her.

On the one hand, I am happy that she will have a family, that she will be going home soon. On the other hand I am really sad that she will not be ours. It's interesting how just a week can make all the difference. Her file had been on the shared list for almost a year, and we missed her by a week.

Which brings me back to the foundational truth that this whole process was God's idea first, and His timing is perfect. We will find our daughter and bring her home at the right time.

However, this little one will always have a piece of my heart.

Letter of Intent

2011-03-02T06:33:00.001-08:00

Yesterday we wrote a very important letter. Our adoption agency asked that we write a Letter of Intent to adopt our little one. This letter was then sent on to China along with a request that her file be returned to our agency.

This letter required us to make certain promises. We promised to teach her about her birth culture and to treat her medical issues, to never abuse or abandon her, and to give her the same rights as our other children. We ended with this sentence, which sums up our heart for this girl: "She will be a precious daughter in our family."

I had wanted to use the words Daughter of this House, but I didn't think that would translate correctly into Mandarin. I've been thinking about the idea of being a Son or Daughter of this House for the last six months or so. The phrase keeps popping into my mind as I'm interacting with the neighborhood kids and my own. I have realized that there is a legitimate difference in the way I treat Frank from down the block and the way I treat my boys. Frank is not a Son of this House, and so does not have the rights and responsibilities of my own sons. If Frank leaves a mess or does something out of line, I can just send him home. If my boys do the same, it reflects on me and my parenting, and I need to help them fix it. When there is a special treat, my kids get first dibs, and hopefully we have enough to invite the neighborhood to share.

Okay, so that may seem obvious to you, but whenever I think this way I fight my American sense of everyone needing to be equal. There really is an advantage to being a Son or Daughter. It makes me feel really grateful that I am a Daughter in God's House, with all the rights, privileges and responsibilities that go along with that. I want to instill in my children what a great thing it is to be a Child of this House, and of God's.

More Prayers, Please...

2011-02-25T20:18:00.000-08:00

I sent an email today asking our agency to pursue the little girl in the previous post as our daughter!

Perry and I have both had a growing sense of peace about her, and today we received two videos confirming that she can walk independently on her knees. If she can walk on her knees, surely she will benefit from prosthetic legs!

But here is where the prayers come in: our adoption agency no longer has her file - it has been assigned to another agency. We will need to petition to have her file transferred back to our agency. This will only happen if the current agency does not have a family for her.

Please pray that God's will be done in this situation. We have a great peace that she will be our daughter. That does not necessarily mean that everything will go smoothly!

Here's another snippet of her cute little self:

Seeking our new daughter.

2011-02-22T20:33:00.000-08:00

Our family is in the uncomfortable stage of our adoption where we are looking at the children currently available and trying to decide whether one of them is our daughter. It is a kind of surreal process - accepting or rejecting children based on a birthdate, a photo, and limited, possibly incorrect information. This is not how it should be - every one of these kids should have a loving, godly family to care for them. But it is where we find ourselves.

For months before our paperwork was done, there was one little girl who kept catching my attention on the photo listing for our agency. Her picture was darling and determined looking, and she was listed as having a deformity of her lower limbs. A couple weeks before we were ready to start pulling files her picture disappeared from our agency's list. I asked about it, and they said it had been transferred to another agency.

Several weeks ago her photo showed up again on an advocacy group I frequent. The family that was considering her decided she was not theirs. We have requested her file, and found out that she is 2 1/2 and that her lower legs are indeed deformed - unusable. The best case scenario is that she will need amputation and prosthetic legs. Worst case is that she will be in a wheelchair permanently.

We have requested more information from China, and have found that she is now walking on her knees. She seems developmentally on target, but may not be available to us through our agency.

We are left with the question: "Is this little one our daughter?"

Will you join us in praying about this? If we feel God is saying she is our daughter, we will do everything we can to lock her file and bring her home. If not, we will pray that her parents find her soon.

I can't post any identifying information at this point, so here is a picture of her little hand holding something - a ball? an orange?

There is so much we don't know about this little girl, but then this decision can't be based purely on what we know. If it was, we would never adopt any child. But God is intimately involved in this process, and He speaks. Please pray that we hear Him clearly.

Drama Queen's Photography

2011-02-02T14:06:00.001-08:00

Drama Queen ventured and and did some winter photography. Enjoy!

Snowpocalypse!

2011-02-02T12:05:00.001-08:00

Happy February!

It is good - very good, to be in a warm, comfortable home with full internet and coffee on demand when outside it looks like this:

The kids are enjoying the snow - except when the snow gets in Z's boots. Then not so much with the enjoyment. Number One Son is working very hard taking layers of snow off the sidewalks and the cars. It is so nice to have a big boy!

The neighbors are all out working. We haven't seen this many people out since the block party.

I don't know when we will be able to get out of our alley.

The next street over closely resembles our alley:

But we believe we have a guardian angel named Jim D. who came through in the night with a snowplow and set our street free:

Thanks, Jim!!!

Catch the Fire

2011-01-20T16:16:00.000-08:00

I'm here in Toronto for a few days at the Catch the Fire Ministries Pastors and Leaders Conference. (Catch the Fire used to be called Toronto Airport Christian Fellowship.) There are some great speakers here, but people really come here for the presence of the Spirit and the ministry time, which is amazing.

I arrived yesterday afternoon. It took almost a whole day before I was able to settle in and engage with the conference. I came in with a few things on my heart that I felt needed breakthrough. There is an issue of freedom, an issue of forgiveness, and a sort of a block or barrier I want to break down.

This morning Carol Arnott spoke on the Baptism of Fire. She believes there are three baptisms referred to in the Bible - the one of water, the one of the Spirit, and the one of Fire. She shared some great personal stories, and then had the attendees line up around the main room. Those of you who have been here know that there are lines in the carpeting placed very strategically so that people can stand on them, and when they fall down they won't fall into the line behind them.

It's amazing to watch Carol and her team go around at a ministry time like that. Hundreds of people were lined up, and Carol went from person to person - down each line - praying FIRE over everyone. She touched each person on the head, and at least 9 out of 10 fell to the ground immediately. Her husband and another church leader followed behind, praying over the people still standing. After their ministry probably 99 out of 100 had fallen, though there was no shame laid on those who still stood. She progressed so quickly that the catchers were running to keep ahead of her after they had laid each person gently to the ground.

I stood at the beginning of a line, worshipping and waiting for the team to arrive at our section. I told God I was open to whatever He wanted to do, but I was not going to fall just for show. I smiled at Carol as she came over to me, and as she touched my head and said Baptism of Fire my knees grew weak and I collapsed backward. It actually felt a lot like a benign electric shock, complete with twitches.

My mind was still completely active though my body was down, and the presence of God was heavy. I realized this was a good chance to have a dialogue with God about my needs for breakthrough. As I brought each need to Him, He gave me a clear internal answer. His voice is gentle and always loving, and He is often funny, but today we were doing serious business.

About my need for breakthrough of my barrier, God said it is not time yet - that my barrier serves a good purpose and I can trust Him with the timing.

About my need for breakthrough in forgiveness, He gave me peace. I was able to give this person over to God, and He removed my judgment and my need for explanation or apology. Praise God, that is freeing!

About my need for breakthrough in freedom, He said I already have it, to walk in my freedom. I get the impression that it is like baby steps - unsteady and full of falls, but always getting better. I just need to step out.

I look forward to what else this conference may hold!

DTC!!!

2011-01-14T14:05:00.000-08:00

We are officially DTC!!! That's adoptionese for Dossier to China!!!

In other words, all divisions of the United States government have officially approved us to adopt, and all our paperwork is on it's way to the Chinese Center for Adoption Affairs in Beijing. It will be hand-delivered on Monday, and a few days after that it will be officially "Logged In" to their system.

In practical terms this means that we will be eligible to lock the file of any child that becomes available on the shared list of Waiting Children. Up to this point we have only been able to lock the files of children who have been on the list for 30 days or more, and though there are more than a thousand children on the list, they are all boys or girls with more involved special needs than we believe God is calling us to add to our family dynamic.

I believe that sometime in the next 1 to 3 months, a little girl will appear on the Waiting Children list who is meant to be our daughter. Please pray with us that God will make this very clear when it happens!

Merry Marshall Christmas

2010-12-21T20:59:00.001-08:00

Since we are headed out of town tomorrow, today was Christmas for us. We managed to put the big boys off until 7:45 am, and then we woke the reluctant teenager and began our gift extravaganza.

Drama Queen was content to lay in the chair and have her gifts presented to her, but the boys were much more actively involved.

Even the pets got a little bit of a gift each.

I am so grateful for my sweet family and the chance to give and receive gifts. May your Christmas be as good and loving as the Marshall's Christmas this year.

It finally happened...

2010-12-17T07:49:00.000-08:00

After 40+ years of being blessed with great eyesight, my eyes have finally started to rebel. Earlier this week I noticed that my left eye was twitching when I looked at things that were close. I could still read and see fine, so I was a bit nervous about what could possibly make my eye twitch.

Luckily Drama Queen and Z had eye exams scheduled, so while I was there I asked the eye doctor a couple of questions, and she did one simple test and proclaimed me over 40. It seems that she sees people all the time who suddenly can't see after then turn 40 - some of them on their actual birthday. So I got a bonus year and a half.

The doctor recommended proceeding to Walgreens and trying on reading glasses. Sure enough, when I tried on the 1.25 glasses I could suddenly see details I hadn't known I was missing. And my eye stopped twitching immediately. Turns out the twitching was muscle strain.

So here they are - the first of many pairs I am sure.

Progress!

2010-12-15T06:08:00.000-08:00

After more than a year of detours and stalls, our Homestudy has been approved by US Immigration! Finally we can submit our information to China, and we are leaps and bounds closer to our daughter!

What next? Once our dossier is accepted by China (this is called a Logged In Date or LID), our agency will watch the current and new lists of Waiting Children for a girl that fits our qualifications and family. They will present us with a file of information on a child, and if it seems the Lord is saying she is our daughter, we will reserve her file and seek permission from China to adopt her. At that point we will travel within 1 to 3 months to get her, spending 2-3 weeks in China.

Yay - we are one huge step closer to actually having our daugher home!

Getaway to Milwaukee

2010-12-13T20:09:00.000-08:00

When Ivan and Isabel Allum were in town, Ivan spoke a prophecy over Perry and I that was very surprising. He said we need to learn to stop striving. He said "I have one word for you: Vacation." This was not what we expected to hear. Both Perry and I work pretty much constantly, and have more to do than we can get done. But if Ivan said it, it must be done. So we set out to Vacation. We figured out that long periods of time away were more than we could do, but we could carve out at least two nights away fairly regularly. So we try to take two or three nights away every 6 to 8 weeks.

Our latest trip was just last week to Milwaukee. And once again, it was a time of real refreshment for us. When we get away, physically and mentally, our outlook changes and we can open ourselves up to our relationship with God and with each other. We are finding what works and what doesn't in terms of logistics, but regardless of the details, the time away is well worth it.

Milwaukee was great because we were able to hop on a Metra train and connect with Amtrak. No driving, no worries about weather or snow-covered roads. We just settled into our seats and got some wine and almonds and relaxed.

We had found a great deal on Hotwire for Hotel Intercontinental. Perry doesn't really care where he stays, but I have found that a really nice hotel gives me a totally different level of relaxation, and can often be just as cheap as a moderate hotel if you know how to shop. We booked tickets for a show the following evening and went out for Ethiopian food. Perry and I share a love of interesting cuisines, and even though Ethiopian is not my favorite, it is so very much better than a burger or a steak.

The next day we visited the Pabst family mansion, which is now a museum. We have toured mansions all over the country, and I find them fascinating. The details of how people used to live are just so interesting. Then we headed over to the Milwaukee Art Museum.

The museum is beautiful, and right on the lake. In some of the rooms the artwork is overshadowed by the beauty right outside the windows.

We both thought the huge table and chairs was pretty interesting. I'm not sure it's art, but it makes a good photo op.

Inspiration

2010-12-08T09:10:00.000-08:00

Lately I have been getting my inspiration from the most amazing families out in the blogging and adoption communities. This video from www.k6comehome.blogspot.com summarizes many of their stories. It is worth watching:

We Can All Make a Difference - 2nd Version from connie johnson on Vimeo.

Gingerbread Men

2010-12-07T07:26:00.001-08:00

Last week The Artist discovered that our local Trader Joe's carries pre-made oversize gingerbread men, all ready to be decorated. Well, we had to have some!

And though they had great fun decorating them, they took about one bite each and then ate the frosting and M&Ms off.

Totally worth it - who needs to eat all that gingerbread anyway?

A Christmas Carol

2010-12-05T16:37:00.001-08:00

Drama Queen just finished her last day as Fred (Scrooge's nephew) in A Christmas Carol, a Play of Movement and Puppetry. She did an awesome job as Fred, as well as Belinda Cratchitt and the Undertaker. The whole show was done with enormous puppets that the cast was inside, so all the inflection came from movement and voice, as well as lighting and sound design. I hope to post pictures soon. We weren't allowed to take pictures, but a photographer came and took some posed pictures of the kids and their puppets.

I'm proud of Drama Queen and her first role at her performing arts school. She got a big role and did it very well. Tonight she makes up for all the time spent on the play by doing tons of homeworks and working on her two monologues for Juries on Tuesday. The work seems neverending, and she's really looking forward to Christmas break!

Giveaways

2010-12-04T15:24:00.000-08:00

So many of the blogs I follow are doing fundraising by selling or raffling great items. One crazy blogger mama is actually giving away really great stuff - a new item every day for 30 days. To read about it or to enter for her awesome prizes, go here:

Christmas Decorations

2010-12-01T14:19:00.000-08:00

I feel very on top of things this year: we have our decorations up and it's only December 1st! The boys and I spent the evening on Monday decorating the tree and putting up the various nativity sets I've collected over the years. So many of our ornaments bring back memories.

Perry managed to get our new angel to stand up straight on top of the tree - no small feat. His final solution involved a wire coat hanger, and it looks beautiful.

Drama Queen got home late from school and play practice, but jumped right in adding garland and lights to the stairs.

Zed most of his time detangling and testing lights. Since he loves anything electrical that was right up his alley.

Now we just need to hang the stockings and hang some more lights. You can never have too many colored lights - at least according to The Artist.

It's not the most beautifully decorated, themed tree in the world, but I think it's just about perfect.